Uncle Jack is universally considered a lewd design. I understand why (sexual and taboo nature). This is also - in part - why it's so hilarious (probably less so for girls).
Anyway, while I was at my neighbor's baby shower this weekend, I met her best friend from South Carolina who went to school to learn about horses (the name of the program is really long and I can't remember it). As we got to talking about my shirts and her horses, it was inevitable that Uncle Jack took center stage.
The process of 'milking' a horse was explained to me. I'll spare the gruesome details, but basically one person holds a bucket while the other reaches in to squeeze the prostate. None of her classmates were particularly enthused - let alone comfortable - with that part of the course. And this particular lady was exempt from any of the hands-on activities due to a broken bone.
With my mind effectively blown, I couldn't help but ask, "Well why not just let nature take its course?"
Apparently because nature is kinky and totally into S&M.
See, the Stallion sometimes gets a little rough and bites the Mare's crest (the part of the neck where the mane grows from). This isn't a playful kind of bite though. It usually draws blood. But thanks to the course of their evolution (mainly being prey animals), they have no nerve endings in their crest (or their tails, as it turns out). So the Mare doesn't feel any pain.
Aside from being gross to clean up after, I imagine there'd be a risk of infection to the open wounds in addition to the obvious cosmetic complications.
She says that some breeders use the equivalent of blow-up dolls. I don't know if these dolls are actually like robots at all or if our tangent started after that (ie, "If you elect me mayor, I promise a robot in every house!").
So the moral of the story is, "Wow. I never imagined Mother Nature was such a kinky girl!"
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